Wait, don’t turn away in disgust just yet.

Zombie Cow Studios, developer of Ben There, Dan That! and Time Gentlemen, Please! has today announced Privates, a game where you … well, there’s no other way of putting this really … “lead a teeny-tiny gang of condom-hatted marines as they delve into peoples’ vaginas and bottoms.”

Ok, you can turn away now if you want. But you’ll miss the screenshots below.

Privates, which is being created in association with Channel 4, promises to be “rude, funny, bitingly satirical and technically pretty accurate if you don’t count the tiny people or the germs with teeth.”

It looks to us a little bit like a 3D update of the ancient 8-bit Fantastic Voyage game. Except instead of delving around inside the entire body, players will be blasting germs and StDs inside virtual genitals.

Privates is coming (sigh) to PC and Xbox 360 this summer. The PC version will be free to download from the Channel 4 or E4 websites, and Zombie Cow say the 360 version “will probably cost a little bit of money, we’ll see.”

Fans of the IncGamers podcast (which should be all of you, obviously) will be aware that news of this game has just provided the team with enough material to last several months.

Paul Younger
Founder and Editor of PC Invasion. Founder of the world's first gaming cafe and Veteran PC gamer of over 22 years.

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